Helpness!!!

Ok, i just started writing a story but im not sure if its good or not, or if i should keep writing...its kinda like a dariy entry kind of story, please tell me if its bad or not!

Heres what i mostly got done:

“This Dairy belongs to: Vengeance”


July 3, 1987

I used to think life was just a word most adults used on kids to prove that they are better then them. That life was just a vast world ready fore an adventure; then again, I used to think a lot of things.
Back in the days when I wondered around, I was so isolated back then, so reserved, but I never knew why. Maybe it was because I was different from other kids, a lot of kids would say that to get out of school every now and then, but I really felt like no one could ever understand me. I was never a bad kid; I got straight A’s and was told all the time that I looked like my dad. Who was my dad? Who was my mom? I hear about them all the time, but I’ve never seen a picture, never got a card. Their world was a complete mystery to me.
Did my parents know I existed? Did they know what I look like? Do they know anything about me? I live in an orphanage; they have to know something about me, where I came from, what my name is? Jesus...what is my name? I lived in the orphanage my whole life but was never given a name…everyone avoided me, so I guess there was no reason for me to have one, I was out of everyone’s mind, no one really ever cared if I was sitting in the back by my self, I enjoyed my solitude, I liked playing by myself, I liked the idea of everyone disappearing so I could be alone. It gave me something to look forward to…

July 4, 1987

Today my Smile machine, that’s my nickname for her, she’s really the head mistress of the orphanage, Tried to get me to talk to a family the might want to adopt me, pft, as if…
“Aren’t you just the cutest little thing!” the wife Exclaimed. Ever thought of going on a diet lady, I thought. The woman pinched my cheeks. Jesus lady you’re the size of a house!
“Oh, look Alex, isn’t she so cute!”
“ She sure is! What’s your name little lady?” Alex asked me. As if I’d answer you, vapor brain…
“Aw, come on, you have to have a name.” Alex pressed. Smile machine turned bright red.
“Oh, um,” She fumbled with words, “ You see, She’s always been are quietest Child, never talks to anyone, and never plays with any of the other kids…So we never really came up with a name for her…” The smile machine sighed. Alex and the woman stared wide-eyed at the smile machine.
“Oh my!” The woman exclaimed.
“ Oh, Dear, Elizabeth…” Alex sighed. Elizabeth must be the woman, I decided.
All the while I stared at them, I knew my eyes showed nothing, lifeless pupils, staring at the two people who thought I was actually interested in going home with them. Bloody Hell.


Later

Alex and Elizabeth have decided to adopt me. Oh joy. I have to pack my things, which isn’t very much, the most prized thing I think I have is my necklace. My necklace is a beautiful sterling sliver Panicle, well, half of one anyway, in the middle of the broken symbol is a ruby, and it shines dark Crimson. Crimson, I think, is one of my favorite colors. Packing up my stuff I noticed, some of the other orphanage girls and boys, were all staring at me with disgust. I over heard them whispering;
“ How come they picked her?! Those folks are rich! Why her?!”
And the boys; “That girl is creepy! Why would they want someone like her?! How old is she?! Like 14?! And she doesn’t even have a name! Those folks are the richest people in London! The Braggarts are there last names! So why her!?” I paid no attention to them; I packed up my things and turned to go. They all fell silent and moved out of my way. The last thing I heard was one of the boys whisper; “That girl will come back with vengeance!” I liked that sound, Vengeance echoed off the walls of the Orphanage, I loved it, the sound of the word, the feeling of it, I walked out to meet my new parents, and they were unaware of the Word Echoing around me. “Vengeance, Vengeance, Vengeance…” it whispered in my ear.


July 5, 1987

Living with the Braggarts, was like torture. They named me Angelina Braggarts. I despised that name, the sound of it, the cheery ringing tone it had to it. I wanted to tear everything in there damn mansion apart, the paintings were to cheery, the furniture was to soft, I missed the hard floors of the orphanage, the small thin uncomfortable spring mattresses, hell, I missed all the damn kids talking about me behind my back. I missed being ignored and left alone. Here, There’s always someone around the corner, always some kind of housemaid in the same stupid room as you. It was nerve rattling, knowing I couldn’t get 5 seconds of fucking peace.
“Well there you are Angelina!” Elizabeth came up to me and said; “we have a surprise for you my darling!” she tugged on my arm to follow her. Ever call me darling again and I will rip your lips off and feed them to a badger…
Elizabeth tugged me down to the foyer; a large room with the biggest, ugliest, brown leather couches you could ever lay eyes on. A huge old carpet lay down on the floor, and Alex was sitting on the couch.
“Hey sweetheart!” Alex patted the seat next to him. I’m not you sweetheart you ugly prick. I slowly made my way over next to him, I didn’t sit but I did stand in front of him, and while he was sitting down, I towered over him, I mentally smiled, mocking him. “I have a present for you!” he held out a box with holes in it on the sides, I was a fairly big box, about twice as big as my head, and I heard a ruffling inside of it. An animal? What kind? Curiously, I took the box and sank down to my knees to open it, the box was wrapped in a red, crimson ribbon, I loved the ribbon, but I wasn’t going to give them the satisfaction of seeing me smile. I hardly ever smiled. I carefully undid the ribbon and stuffed it into my black dress pocket. I lifted the lid on the box and my brain could not believe what my eyes were seeing. My mouth fell open in awe.
“ Do you love him?!” Elizabeth exclaimed. Oh my god.
Carefully I lifted the Baby cat out of the box. It was a baby white tiger! It was so cute, I stroked its fur with my indexed finger, he purred, delighted. I suppressed a smile. I nodded.
“Good! We were hoping you’d like him!” Alex smiled.


Later

I headed up stairs with my tiger. I carefully climbed up into my bed, which was, like, 5 feet of the ground. I placed the tiger on the left side of my bed and surrounded him with pillows. He purred and buried his head into them, I laughed softly. He looked up at me, he had blue eyes as bright as mine, and I smiled.
“Goodnight, Rage…” I whispered, I was surprised by the puniness of my voice, I hadn’t spoken a word to anyone in years, and I was too tired to care.


July 6, 1987

I woke up that next morning to find that Rage had moved, he was lying right next to my head, I held sill and felt the inhale and exhale of his body. I smiled and reached up, stroking his head. Rage woke and began to purr like a motorboat. I sat up, still groggy; I was NOT a morning person…
Heading down the three flights of stairs, Rage was at my heals, bounding around ready to play. I walked into the kitchen and grabbed a piece of bread and threw it in the toaster. I turned around and a maid was standing there with her mouth wide open in horror. I looked around. What did I do? I thought. Her eyes were fixed on the toaster.
“Y-y-You aren’t supposed to make your self breakfast,” she whispered. “That’s a maids job.” I looked back at the toaster, and put my hand out over it, instinctively the toast popped out and flew into my hand. I tore off a piece with my teeth and walked right past her. I didn’t care what maids were supposed to do; I wasn’t going to search this damn house to find someone to make me a piece of freaking toast. I went out into the living room and looked over at the black and white T.V. , Alex and Elizabeth Were watching some kind of show called “I love Lucy”. It looked like a stupid show to me so I walked past them and Alex turned to see me, walking by.
“Hey kiddo! How did you sleep? Was Your Tiger A good sleeper?” He asked, I gritted my teeth and looked at him with hollow eyes.
“Rage…” I hissed through clenched teeth. Rages ears perked up and he sensed my hate for this man, Rage let out a low hiss. Alex looked confused, I have been in this house for 3 weeks but this is the first time I have spoken at all.
“Rage?” He questioned. I pointed down at my little white tiger. Alex looked at him.
“Oh! The tiger! You named him Rage?” I nodded, and turned leaving the room.

Later Outside

Out on the dock, which was raised over the side of the cliff to a view of the Atlantic Ocean, Rage was happily seated in my lap. I stroked him, and he purred.
“Well Rage, I really want to get out of here…Elizabeth is annoying, and if Alex ever calls me kiddo again my ears are going to fall off!” Rage looked up at me and meowed as if agreeing with me. My voice was still so puny. So innocent sounding, I hated it. I looked up at the out stretching sky, I saw all the stars twinkling, and Smiling, and I wished I was as free as a star.


July 7, 1987


The does it, I am so out of here. This morning Alex and Elizabeth “Celebrated” My exact three weeks of living here. I wanted to tear my hair out and scream bloody murder in Alex’s face, and I wanted to slam the damn cake into Elizabeth’s pants. I’d watch her dance around screaming “Demon child! Get out of my house!!!” I mentally smiled. Demon child, haha, I liked that. My favorite nickname, however, will always be vengeance. The name the orphanage gave me as I walked out the door, I love the sound of it, the way its luminous sound echoed around me. Vengeance…
Up in my room, I picked out a bag, small enough so it wouldn’t be suspicious, but large enough to carry what I needed in it. I packed 4 Black Dresses, 3 packages of raw stake for Rage, and his water bowl, I packed a comb, 3 pairs of socks, and a box of Band-Aids. I packed 2 bags of beef jerky, and 3 water bottles. Last thing to do was to grab some money and something to sleep on, Alex’s dumb ass gave me the key to the safe so I ransacked it, and took $5,000. I packed two thin blankets and a really long pillow for Rage and I to share. Last thing I put in my bag was this Dairy.
Slowly opening the door to “My room” I checked to see if the cost was clear, it was. I went back in my room and grabbed some blankets and sheets. It was dark as pitch out so no one would see me. I carefully tied all the sheets and blankets together and knelt down to pick up Rage.
“ You have to go in my backpack for a second, ‘Kay?” Rage growled softly. I tucked him carefully in my sack and tied the rope I made to my bed; I threw it out the window, and climbed carefully up onto the windowsill. Slowly I made my way down the side of the three-story mansion.
When my feet felt the touch of the ground floor, I looked around the garden.